It is very much so an issue, but let's be careful here to not equate HIV and AIDs. Let's not kid ourselves, people continue to die from AIDS today Only suggested that having a more open and less poz-phobic mind may help encourage people around you to share their status in a less hostile environment. Creating phobia causes an environment where laws are less followed. Let's face it laws on paper don't prevent everyone from doing anything all the time. Working in law enforcement it has made my job so much easier. I'm really glad that criminals follow laws. Knowingly that what they are doing can hurt someone in perhaps devestating ways - it's criminal. Study on social anxiety and transmission risk: Every couple that does it has their own rules but if you're doing it for the wrong reasons it will only breed resentment.Īlso if you're hooking up with other guys always use condoms, and regularly get checked for STIsĪctually backed by research that highly negative views of poz people discourage them from sharing TLDR it's all about being honest with each other and yourself.
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He ended up not finding anyone and I figured I was actually pretty ok with it when I felt more disappointed for him than any sense of relief. I could also take the opportunity to veto if I felt bad about it. I ended up suggesting it to him although on the grounds he sends me the guys pics so I could have a perv. He recently went away to a conference and I really had to think about whether I would be ok with him hooking up with someone without me there. We'd never done anything completely separately before though. There's been times he's invited guys over with me at home when I wasn't keen but I didn't mind him having fun, although most times I end up joining in for a bit. That would be a good recipe for resentment. Although it plays a factor in my thinking I have always been wary of saying yes out of some sense of obligation to my partner because of some messed up sense of me not being enough for him. I live with chronic pain and depression which, along with the meds, has an impact on my labido. We always discuss it beforehand and make sure both of us are interested.Ī big part of it is being honest with yourself too though to ensure you're not saying "ok" even if you're not. We've done saunas, app hookups, hooked up with friends/acquaintances. When we started getting serious we talked about it and were both happy with the idea of group stuff as long as we were together.
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When we started dating we weren't expecting the other to be exclusive. We've always been good with communication, that's a big part of it.